The Cranky Ol' Bat

Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death! - RuPaul


Alternatives to Mardi Gras

BTW everyone, laissez les bon temps roulez, and save some pancakes for me!

(Yes, I know no one actually says that in New Orleans.....but I'm in Phoenix and can say whatever I want on my own damn blog. So there!)

Ok, maybe you didn't get your butt in gear in time, and now it's too damn late to get to the Crescent City. You are still in a party mood, and don't want to do the same ol' thing that everyone else is doing. Fair enough. For your consideration, gentle readers, the Jet Set Chick presents "Festivals I'm Sure Nobody You Know Has Ever Been To":

1) Congreso de Brujas in Catemaco, Mexico. Can't wait for Halloween? 4 March starts the fun with an annual festival of all things magical during this get-together for witches, wizards and's a two-hour drive from Veracruz, according to Frommer's. Put a hex on your ex!

2) Jamaica Carnival in Kingston. Ok, you missed the real date for Carnival. And maybe they'll even have the official website up by 27 March. ( But...this is the offseason for airfare to Jamaica. And where else can you find Carnival with a reggae beat? Or get some jerk goat? Yah, mon!

3) National Lawnmower Racing Championships in Lake Mendota, IL. Sorry, danger fans, no blades on the mowers.....but they do reach speeds of up to 60 MPH. If you have $15 to $25 and your own mower, maybe you can take home the prize! Head out 2 hours on Route 34 from Chicago. For more info, call 847-729-7363.

4) Spamarama in Austin TX. Just check the website. before 2 April. I know the brother of the Jet Set Chick would do well in the Spam Cram. Anyone who goes to Filiberto's to deliberately provoke a "green meat attack" (he says it's to keep his immune system revved up and ready for action....I think he just likes to eat cat meat. Angus beef my ass!) can handle BBQ fake ham. Can you?

If you still want to see more, check out this webpage:

Hey, any excuse for a party, right????

I STAND CORRECTED (12 Feb): Ok, my brother does not go to Filiberto's to provoke a "green meat attack" any more. He used to. He now eats week-old rotisserie chicken. It's still a bizarre habit and proof that he needs help. (Remember that Simpson's episode where Homer refuses to give up the sandwich that's turning bad until he eats the whole damn thing? That's my brother in 10 years.)


  • At 5:40 PM, Blogger DragonStormInAZ said…

    I thought that every day was a party, excuse or not? :)

  • At 8:28 AM, Blogger G Zupko said…

    It is not Filibertos, it is week old rotisserie chicken. If your going to make comments about me, get them straight.

    Mmmmm, chicken.


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