The Cranky Ol' Bat

Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death! - RuPaul


He Might Be Human, But He Ain't Getting Any Love Outta Me!

Howdy, everybody! This weekend sure was weird. Made it back to Phoenix way later than we planned (Amateur Worst, now Tsar Charming's least favorite airline, got us home at 4:30 am on Sunday, three hours late. The gate looked like it was crowded with refugees trying to get on the last plane out. I've never seen so many sober people grateful to wolf down Taco Bell at midnight like there were in Las Vegas' McCarran International on Saturday.) And then the power went out at 6 pm Sunday.....and didn't come back on until 4:10 am.

I am NOT looking forward to cleaning out my fridge, lemme tell ya!

Fortunately we didn't have as much food as we usually do, but heaven knows what I'm going to find in there.....

Anyway, whatever I discover has got to be better than the latest musical in Britain. It is based on the songs from my absolute least favorite 80's band, the Smiths (NY Times, registration required, sorry!). Yup, the whiniest band ever has had their songs adapted to a theatrical production called "Some Girls are Bigger Than Others".

No, I'm not going to go see it. No way, no how, not even with free tickets and all expenses paid to London.

If I ever got a chance to kick the living shit out of their lead singer, believe me, Morrissey would be bleeding out of every orifice. I hated them way before an annoying neighbor decided to get stoned and blast that crap the night before a Russian final my sophomore year. (Don't cry for me, though.....aced it anyway, and got revenge on the maggot with a very special early morning wakeup call from my boom box before I left to take the exam. I still remember that tape, called "Fury of the Brave Bulls", featuring the top hits of the Spanish corrida. Enjoy the hangover, you mutha@#$%^&!!)

Good times, right, scone? ;)

Of course, it's hitting the road for Ireland and Australia. So far, New York has been spared, mainly because the reviews have been horrible. If you are interested, tickets are available online for shows through 23 July at the Lyric Hammersmith.

If you go, be sure to slap the dork in the bunny suit for me......


  • At 7:46 PM, Blogger Scone said…

    I still have that tape! It's not in great shape, but it still makes me laugh to hear it.

  • At 8:12 PM, Blogger eLarson said…

    The Smiths! Reminds me of an old favorite from The Dead Milkmen:
    "You'll Dance to Anything... by The Smiths..."

  • At 11:02 PM, Blogger Slap-Happy said…

    Hmmm... all I can say is that my brother's favorite song is "If you love someone, set them on fire" by some punk band in the 80's.

    I only know that Morrissey cried.

    and cried.

    damn him.

  • At 1:37 PM, Blogger Deacon Blues said…

    Must have been all the drugs, I don't remember the Smiths or anything by them.

  • At 10:57 AM, Blogger half said…

    ima missed a lot of the late 70s early 80s too. ah well

    say lavie

  • At 5:06 PM, Blogger Kory O said…

    I was wondering where that damn tape went to, Scone! ;)

    Ever play it for the boys as a "wake up call"? Heh, I am vicious sometimes.....


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