The Cranky Ol' Bat

Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death! - RuPaul


Lost Your Mind in Las Vegas, and You're Stone Cold Sober?

Well, then, the glitter city has plenty of insanely priced libations for you to rectify your sobriety problem.

When I say insane, I mean it. I'm talking margaritas that go for $69 each at N9NE Steakhouse at the Palms Resort and Casino. And that's one of the cheaper options, believe it or not.

Why so much? Most of these drinks use ultra-premium liquor, the kind usually reserved for sipping neat. This isn't the stuff you get at the local Osco. It's stuff that maybe you might find at the most expensive gourmet store in town.....if it's available. Only if the store's supplier can get it, too.

Very few of the drinks give you something to remember the experience. The Hard Rock Cafe has a $1000 martini with a diamond-studded gold olive pick. Mandalay Bay's Rumjungle offers a French 75 with a pair of 1.5 karat earrings for the bargain price of $8200 (drop the earrings and it's a mere $1200).

If you already have enough jewelry, consider a Vodka Locker Experience at Mandalay Bay's Red Square, where for between $3000 to $6000, you get to wear sables while trying out hooch from their selection of 170 different vodkas stored below freezing.

Enough of the cheap crap!

If you just can't be bothered with the bargains listed above, get thee to MGM Grand and order the High Limit Kir Royale at the Teatro Euro Bar. It combines Louis Roederer Cristal Rose Champagne, Hardy's Perfection Cognac, Grand Marnier Cent Cinquantenaire and fresh raspberries. $2200 per flute.

Now, for a relative bargain, try Liquid Gold from Mandalay Bay's Fleur de Lys.

1 cube brown sugar
3 drops Angostura bitters
1/4 oz Grand Marnier Cent Cinquantenaire
1/4 oz Hennessy Paradis
1/4 oz verbena syrup (for a lemon note)
5 oz Champagne Krug, Reims
1 fresh raspberry
Candied orange
sprinkle of 24 karat gold flakes

Drop one sugar cube soaked with the bitters into a chilled flute. Add the Grand Marnier, Hennessy and verbena syrup, fill up with the champagne. Garnish with a fresh raspberry and candied orange with a sprinkle of gold.

Just $75, not including tip.



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